Crazy Polish Kate is such a teenager. We went to the beach tonight and she was totally excited that her ex is going to take our kids camping next weekend so that she and I can have a girl's retreat out on Cortes Island. She blathered on and on about all of the wonders of Cortes, how the place is like some kind of utopia of pot and alcohol and lakes and hot easy men. I'd say, "I don't care what it's like as long as the weather is nice and I can get a drink and a burger," and she'd cut me off, saying, "Ohhhh, you can get the BEST burgers in the world there!"
Nothing about the place is mediocre, according to Kate. Everything is the BEST, the most BEAUTIFUL, and apparently I am going to have THE GREATEST WEEKEND EVER.
She became so excited that she did her cute breathless Polish thing and began dropping words, so she'd say, "Don't worry! I have tent, I have cooler!"
On the way home she started checking out every guy we passed and on occasion would scream out the window things like, "Woo hoo cutie--nice ass!" or "Hey baaaaaaa-bay, give us summothat sugar!"
Keep in mind we had 3 kids in the back, covered in sand and staring at us freakishly with their wet bathing suits and goggles on.
Eventually she noticed them and said to me, "those kids are really cramping our style. Wouldn't it be great if we could just throw a blanket over them?"
I'm pretty sure she was kidding. Well, I'm at least 30% sure.
7 comments:
bwah ha ha!
You actually make it sound like you can have a life and have kids AT THE SAME TIME!
My sis has 2 kids, an involved husband, 2 sets of grandparents within an hour drive who love to babysit, but she talks constantly about how hard it is to do anything b/c she has kids.
Katie, Polish Kate cracks me up. Um, I really hope that Cortes Island lives up to at LEAST one of your expectations. Can i come too? [panting]
Renee--tell your sister that it's easy to have fun as long as you put aside a few dollars a week into an account specifically for the therapy your child will need after surviving your bizarre parenting methods!
Weas--of course you can come with us! Renee--you too! Just don't cramp our style, or Kate will throw a blanket over you.
Love the blog, Katie. You're inspiring me.
Just. Stop with the Marky Mark references. It's just not nice to dangle the photo in front of me when I least expect it. Gives me the vapors!
Baby, I will be dangling that boy around as long as I can. You'd better hope he films a movie in Vic soon, because for you ladies, I would stalk him and try to take naked pics of him. But only for you. Because I am selfless like that. You are so lucky to have a friend like me.
Okay, Katie?
I'm already having Technical Difficulties.
I decided to take the plunge and do a blog. So I began the easy easy process, which I see Renee and Weas both have done. Apparently, every sign in name ever is "unavailable". I started entering my first name with various #s after it, using outlandish nicknames I once had, everything.
I entered the name MELBA and it said unavailalbe.
I'm not telling you this for any reason. Just that you've got a name like KATIE (not outrageous) and you were able to use it, right?
I registered as katiesbrain, Tee. But you can make the title anything you want once you're registered.
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