1) Cutesy expressions: like "anyhoo." WHAT IS THAT?! For example, "So, anyhoo, we'll all be at the barn dance with Marge later if you don't see us at karaoke night!" Or, "Anyhoo, my mom bought me the cutest pink sweatshirt with a fluffy white kitten on it." I don't understand this at all, but it's even worse when I hear a man say "anyhoo." See my reaction to short robes below in the previous post, and you'll understand what this does to me.
2)Fashion from hell: Ok, we've all made fashion mistakes. I know I have. Once in the 80's I actually went out in public wearing a neon pink beret, a baby pink angora sweater dress, neon pink fingerless gloves (!!!!) and white keds with neon pink socks peeking out. I must have been on drugs. I was walking down the street and a bunch of guys in a truck drove by screaming, "turn it DOWN!!!" So much for expression. So, yes, humiliating, but I learned my lesson.
3)Email chain letters: You know the kind--"if you send this email to five people in five minutes you will have love and laughter in your life forever. If you delete this, a strange person will rip all your pubic hair out from the roots!" Well I'm not worried. I've already had all the pubic hair ripped out from the roots once, and I PAID someone to do it! So don't threaten me with weird horrid fates because I don't want to pass on your sentimental crap...I'm tough.
P.S. I know Marky Mark in his Calvin Kleins has very little to do with any of this post, but I cannot abide a day without seeing a picture of my future husband (back off Melly!) in his tighty-whities.
2 comments:
You PAID for that????
At least the dentist provides anesthesia.
The sympathy pains are unreal.
Thanks Gern--I have healed on the outside, but the emotional scars are deep. ;-)
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